Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Black Eye Pea Samiches

No artistic liscense taken in the following:

Karl was a co-op student who worked for me from 1992 till he graduated in 1995, when he came in as a full time management trainee. He was a student at Auburn, but was working with me in SW Alabama. He maintained his trailer in Auburn during the quarters he was co-opping.

We had business in Montgomery, then went to Auburn to visit a potential supplier. We made a side trip to check on his trailer. Since I was there I asked to use his phone and call Rootie's mother. He heard my side of the conversation:
(it was about 11:30, just before lunch)
'Hi- I was just in town on business and thought I would call'
-
'No, we really need to get back to Lower Alabama. We'll grab a burger and eat on the road'

Karl chimes in "If she's inviting us to lunch we'll make time"

MIL hears this and says 'Well that settles that. I'll see you a few minutes"

I hang up and tell Karl "You have no idea what you have just done"

We pull into MIL's driveway and she is in the "herb garden" with her basket. We pull on down and exchange pleasantries. Karl then asks "So what's for lunch?"

"Hummus" comes the reply.

"Never heard of it" says Karl.

"Well, it's usually made from Garbanzo beans but I don't have any. I'm using black eyed peas left over from last night."

So, Karl watches wide eyed as MIL puts black eyed peas, 3 cloves of garlic, and a hand full of mint in the food processor. Yes, I said garlic and mint.

MIL is also semi-famous for her home made bread. It is heavy. How heavy? You know how on Nova or other PBS science shows when they are talking about black holes and neutron stars and how a quarter teaspoon weighs as much as a Sherman tank? O.K. that's an exageration, a full teaspoon would only weigh as much as a Chevette. they had a bread machine that made round loaves, which was served in quarter slices that look like little pizza slices, about 3 inches on a side. Being a 20 year old, Karl makes 4 little sandwiches. Which he has to choke down with unsweet tea. Unsweet tea that is loaded with mint.

I have no frame of reference to describe "hummus" made with black eyed peas, mint, and too much garlic. You will have to use your own imagination.

Thus is the true story of the black eyed pea samiches.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

My first ever meme

Name Yourself Meme
A meme from the Happy Wonderer (http://happywonderer.wordpress.com)…

1. MY ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Snuffy Venture

2. MY GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Rocky Road Peanut Butter

3. MY “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
TDod

4. MY DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Green Dachshund

5. MY SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Wilbur Fitzgerald

6. MY STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Dod-Te
7. MY SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
The Blue Bourbon

8. MY NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
Earnest Hayward

9. MY WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names)
Hayward Annette

10. MY TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a city that starts with the same letter)
Irwin Indianapolis

11. MY SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Fall Daffodil

12. MY CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
Nectarine Oxfordy

13. MY HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)
Yogurt Maple

14. MY ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The Woodworking Rain Tour.

Monday, August 20, 2007

What Be Your Nerd Type?
Your Result: Science/Math Nerd
 

(Absolute Insane Laughter as you pour toxic chemicals into a foaming tub of death!)

Well, maybe you aren't this extreme, but you're in league with the crazy scientists/mathmeticians of today. Very few people have the talent of math and science is something takes a lot of brains as well. Thank whosever God you worship, or don't worship, so thank no deity whatsoever in your case, for you people! Most of us would have died off without your help.

Drama Nerd
 
Literature Nerd
 
Gamer/Computer Nerd
 
Artistic Nerd
 
Social Nerd
 
Anime Nerd
 
Musician
 
What Be Your Nerd Type?
Quizzes for MySpace

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Pearls Before Swine has become my favorite comic strip. I don't have a fixed time to read it each day (job doesn't allow a fixed time for anything), but I usually try to read it when I need a spiritual pick-me-up. The humor is rather odd but right in line with my own sense of humor. A couple of recent strips are relevent to some of what's going on in the feminist/ former feminist camps.






You can find the daily strip at:


http://www.comics.com/comics/pearls/index.html

Saturday, July 14, 2007

More music- today I'm into Led Zep

People who think they know me, but really don't, are always shocked to learn HOW much of a Led Zepplin fan I am. I guess it's the all business, capitalist facade most of them see. Last night going to eat sushi #4 son spotted the Led Zep cd cases and asked if we could listen to them. He asked what my favorite song was. Care to guess? It's not Stairway to Heaven, it's this:



I'm also very fond of this one, it's sounds like they are having so much fun when they play it:


(o.k. I know it's not the best video, but it was the only one with the version from "Led Zeppelin IV")

#4 said his his favorite was "The one where the guy screams 'ahhhh ahhhh ahhhh". I guess that would because it has been used in a couple of kid's movies, including Shrek 3. this is for him:



And this one is Rootietoot's favorite. Probably the richest, deepest (musicly deep, not lyrically deep) song I've ever heard. It ranks close to "Jessica" by the Allman Brothers.

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Another Mr. McMaster story

Since my afternoon commute home took me through Tennille (we lived S of town) I got to where I would stop and visit Mr. McMaster 1 or 2 evenings a week. The visit always involved an RC Cola or a Nehi from the old vending machine. I would always buy something: some screws, a drill bit, never anything of real significance. Mr. McMaster's son had a "new" store (which was probably 20 years old) in Sandersville which was doing quite well, but traffic was almost non-existence in the original store. Tennille was founded in the 1870's, and I believe the McMasters had been selling hardware from the storefront facing the railroad tracks most if not all of that time.

Anyway, I would nominate the elder Mr. McMaster as a National Treasure. I always felt uplifted after a visit. The Old Man had a wicked wit and sense of humor. Once, when I was perusing my woodworking catalogues in search of a vise to mount on my workbench to hold boards Rootietoot suggested I see what Mr. McMaster had before I bought from a mail order company. Good idea, I thought, so the next evening I stopped in. Halfway through the Nehi Mr. McMaster asked "What kind of hardware you need tonight?"

"Well, actually today I'm looking for a vice" I reply.

"Umm, what do you need advice on?"

"No, I need A VICE"

"Oh (chuckle chuckle) you need a vice. O.K. (digging in his pockets) I have some cigaretttes, and there's a liquor store across the way. But you'll have to pick one of those..." he paused with a twinkle in his eye "because the last cat house in this area closed after WW2."

Rootie and I went for a drive

It's the 4th of July. Rootietoot actually woke before me this morning, and after I ate some breakfast and had my obligatory 2nd cup of coffee, she suggested we take a ride.

"Where to" asked I.

"Does it matter" was the reply.

So off we go, with a county map that shows ALL the roads, including dirt ones, and a state map for once we crossed the county line. We went through Metter, Millen, Wadley, Barlow, Barstow, Midville, Riddleville, Louisville, Bipperville, Bopperville, Kipperville and Kopperville (10 points to the one who correctly identifies the 'literary' origin of those last 4). Eventually we found ourselves in Sandersville, home of my first job out of college, and where we were when #1 was born (actually we lived in Tennille, a suburb S on Hwy 15). We stopped and ate lunch then rode down to Tennille.

As we went through the mostly abandoned downtown area of Tennille we passed what was McMaster's True Value when we lived there. Mr. McMaster had to have been in his late 80's at the time, and McMaster's True Value was like a trip back in time. It was a genuine old timey hardware store and Mr. McMaster claimed to have anything you could ever need. It became a bit of a game with my father-in-law when they were visiting to try and ask for something obscure, and show that he didn't really have everything. Mr. McMaster always had the thing f-i-l was asking for, from a spring tongue for an old Stanley hand plane to .... whatever. The game culminated after one of my in-laws trips to the home place in Texas, from which he returned with an old hand pump for a well. "I'll get the Old Man this time" he bragged Friday evening when they arrived. He needed to replace the leather gasket and flapper that went inside the old pump. They acted as a check valve to keep the water from going back down as you pumped.

Saturday morning f-i-l and I ride in to town and go into the store. We get us an RC Cola from the old type vending machine that you have to pull the bottle out of, damaging your hand in the process.

"Well, what are you looking for this time, young Mr. Toot?" asked Mr. McMaster after pleasantries were exchanged.

"I need the leathers for a hand pump" said f-i-l with a pleased note in his voice.

"What size" asked Mr. M

"What?!?!"

"Do you need 2 inch, 3 inch, or 4 inch?"

"Uhhh, uhhh it's a 3 inch" said a stunned father-in-law.

"The thick kind or the thin ones? There were 2 different kinds of 3 inch"

"I don't know"

Mr. M dawdles back behind the counter and comes out with a VERY old wooden box. He opens the box and pulls out several oily rags.

"I have to wrap them in oily rags to keep them from drying out" he says, then holding up 2 different sets says "This is the thick one, and this is the thin ones. Which one looks like what you will need?"

"I have no idea"

"Well, pay for one and take both back with you. Send the one you don't need back with Young Mr. Daddio next time he comes to visit you."

Like somebody else might come in one day looking for leathers for manual well pump.

Monday, June 18, 2007

This is too close to true to be funny.....

Edit 6-19-07 I meant to mention this was copied from a circulating e-mail and is not an actual personal experience. Sorry for the unintentional misrepresentation.
Math 1950-2007


Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter-girl took my $2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help . While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried. Why do I tell you this?



Answer: Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s


1. Teaching Math In 1950
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?


------------------------- -------------------------
2. T eaching Math In 1960
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

------------------------- ------------------------- ------------------
3. Teaching Math In 1970
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?

------------------------- -------------------------
4. Teaching Math In 1980
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

------------ ------------------------- -------------------------
5. Teaching Math In 1990
A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes?

(There are no wrong answers. )

------------------------- -------------------------
6. Teaching Math In 2007
Un hachero vende una carretada de maderapara $100. El costo de la producciones es $80. Cuanto dinero ha hecho?

Sunday, June 17, 2007

The name's Daddio, Sweet Daddio....

I have an infatuation with James Bond. It may stem from the fact that my life is so anti-Bond. By 30 minutes into each movie he has slept with more women than I have my whole life (that number for me btw is 1). Exotic locations for me means Tybee Island, or Sylvania. The closest thing I've come to saving the world was helping to develop a new lightweight bullet/flak proof fabric that wouldn't weigh down pilots if they ditched in water. Most of the crises I face involve bad bearings, bent rolls, or raw material shipments that are late. Sometimes I get to work on a problem as threatening as girlfriend problems for #3 son. My ability to fix things with minimal resources has in the past earned me the nickname "McGyver", but it's Bond James Bond I really want to be.

I own all the original Ian Fleming novels. The fascinating thing about the novels is that they take place starting in the early fifties, and most of the bad guys were former Nazis or other displaced persons of nefarious background for whom all records of their existence were destroyed in WWII. They then give themselves new identities with fanciful names like Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Auric Goldfinger or Hugo Drax. Of the movies, only Dr. No, From Russia With Love, and On Her Majety's Secret Service follow the novels of the same name.

Rootietoot and The Boys have been gifting me with 'The Ultimate James Bond Collection' for Christmas, b'day, etc. With the boxed set I recieved for Father's Day I have all but one set. I've been watching the new movies today between Nascar and the U.S. Open golf tournament. So, for today I get to vicariously be a dashing handsome secret agent.

Tomorrow I go back to being plain old Sweet Daddio.

Things that make me laugh

I can't say I have a favorite movie- but this one is certainly on my top 5 list



I think "Creature Comforts" is the most creative enterprise of the last 25 years





And 8 year olds working on developing their comic skills as detailed here:
http://beacuseitspersonal.blogspot.com/2006/04/4-at-genesis-of-his-comic-career.html

Saturday, June 9, 2007

Music

(This post is not intended as arrogant as it will start out. Bear with it)

God has given me many gifts. I can, and have, build a Duncan Phyfe sideboard (or Gustav Stickley, or Shaker, or a style known in a small circle by my own name), rebuild a Chevy small-block and make it purr like the proverbial kitten, develop new industrial processes which become patented, build a frame house from a stack of lumber or a log cabin without a kit, or completely change the inside of a house by removing walls and redsigning the interior. My services have been sought for designing kitchens in half-million dollar houses. I have a quantifiable good eye for color, and have influenced seasonal color pallets for 3 major houses of fashion (get this kids- I used to do color design for Victoria's Secret!) I can repair virtually anything that is broken, and I was at one time a certified pipe welder. I have been told I am an empath, and somehow become the company therapist every where I have worked.

But human nature being what it is, I deeply covet the one gift I am most lacking- musical ability. There are days I would trade all my other skills to be able sit and play the guitar with 1/2 of Dickie Betts' skill. Why?

Music is probably the single best way to make a large population happy. Even before today's mass communications, music was available to large groups. Moods of an entire nation can be influenced (Josef Goebels new this and used it for nefarious purposes). Even the worst day at work is softened when a happy tune with personal memories attached comes on the radio during the evening commute. Fussy babies are comforted by a lullaby. Hearts are won by a serenade (o.k. being able to repair the voltage regulator in a VW helped me to win Rootietoot's heart, but how much better could it have been to play and sing "Blue Sky?"). When a small group is together for an intimate gathering, the experience can be made better by one member strumming gently on a 6 string, but saying "come on gang, let's go to the shop and tune the Chevy or make a piece of case furniture" doesn't really have the same effect.

And every one of us has at least one song which brings memories (hopefully good, but sometimes unpleasant) pouring in when you hear it. Mine are an eclectic collection, from mine and Rootie's "special song" Blue Sky by the Allman Brothers, to Pyromania by Def Lepard and Ravel's Bolero (doesn't that make you curious?).

I can influence my own mood by music selection. If I'm angy when I get in the car in the evening, the Allman Brothers can always make me happy. Led Zepplin (select songs) can be uplifting too. If I'm feeling mellow, Lynyrd Skynyrd is good to pump me up on my morning commute. That's a powerful medicine.

You have to understand how bad my lack of musical ability is. Even trying to sing or humm to the boys as babies made them cry harder.

363 days a year I am satisfied with everything about my life, but what I do brings satisfaction to a very small circle. Some days I wish I could reach out to a larger group, and music would seem to be the best way to do that.

So- 2 questions: 1)What songs evoke strong memories for you and 2) What skills do you not have that you desire deeply?

Friday, June 8, 2007

Allman Brothers - Jessica

Another song that makes it impossible for this redneck to have unhappy thoughts. If a genie were to grant me 1 wish, I believe it would be to be able to play the lead on this song.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

ALLMAN BROTHERS BLUE SKY

This is mine and Rootietoot's "Special Song". It is impossible for me to listen to this and have unhappy thoughts.

Friday, June 1, 2007

Ummm a pool

So, G (owner of the company) decided I would get an extra day's pay for working Memorial Day (my jerk boss had originally declared I made enough already and wasn't going to pay me like he was the others). Rootie and I decided we would use the windfall to buy an aboveground pool. So, she and the boys went to Wally World today and bought an 18' by 4' deep pool. We will assemble it tonight and fill it some tonight and finish it tomorrow. Then we will swim! And I can come home in the evenings and cool off with a dip.

I hope it turns out to be as nice as I'm anticipating.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Yay I'm having lunch with Rootie!

She just called and is back in town. She's picking up sandwiches and coming out. I know she's only been gone 2 1/2 days, but my pulse still picks up when her ring tone (Halleluia chorus) goes off on my phone. She can still make me feel like a 20 year old.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

I created the pop-off valve to blow off and not burden Rootie with my disgruntlement when I (finally) get home each evening. But lest you get the idea I'm a totally negative person, I will post my Good Thoughts here.